After a flash of a week at home in Wisconsin, I’m back in Suwon, Korea.
Suwon, my home away from home — or maybe my actual home, my new home, my adopted home — I’m never quite certain. These sorts of distinctions grow more and more blurred, and perhaps less and less important, by the day.
Being in Wisconsin was sublime, to be sure, taking in the familiarity of it all — the way you know your grandpa’s house by heart, the way your parent’s embrace makes you feel like a child again, the way you can pick up a conversation with an old friend as if you’ve never ended the last one, the way revisiting a place envelops you in memory so warm and fluid you don’t want to leave. But being in Wisconsin was also strange. You notice that some things are not so familiar, and you find yourself feeling unfamiliar within and among them. You arrive home thinking the present involves you, intrinsically and permanently, but by the end you realize it’s only the past that’s got you locked in its archives, where photos and documents and records can prove you were there. Now your home has changed, and because you’ve changed in a different time and place, you’re no longer tethered together by the insides.
I enjoyed it all, even the parts that caused such contemplative confusion. The family reunion, the reconnecting with old friends, the jaunt into Madison to watch the memories of my college days unfold like a parade down State Street. But I was also satisfied to come back to Suwon, where I feel like I’m living in the present, where connections are current and feelings are experienced, not just remembered.
Filed under: back in wisconsin, family and friends, out-of-country excursions, reflection | 1 Comment
Tags: home, madison, memories, wisconsin